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| Melrose Abbey, one of the most pwerful Thin Places I have ever been to. |
In a recent conversation the person I was speaking with made reference to a “Thin Place” which rather threw me. I had not come across that phrase before – well aside from teaching one of the girls how to roll out a pie crust and warning of pulling it too taut so it broke.
But the words stuck with me and I did some poking around on the Internet to see what I could learn about this concept from a spiritual perspective – which is the context I heard it in.
It is a phrase that seems to have originated within the Celtic community and is most commonly associated with the Spirituality of Ireland, Scotland, Wales and England. At the most basic level it refers to those places where we become aware of the other side of the veil, that very thin barrier which keeps up apart from the Divine, the past or the presence of God most of the time. Other groups may call it spiritual discernment. Not everyone can sense it, experience the awareness of it or even believe it exists.
And that is okay. Perhaps it is not meant to be a group experience. Perhaps like many of the Gifts of the Spirit mentioned in 1 Corinthians 12 there are certain gifts each person receives, and asking for them all would not only be greedy but in many ways, overwhelming. Spiritual gifts are different from natural talents. The spiritual gifts of knowledge, wisdom, prophecy, faith, healing, miracles, spiritual discernment, speaking in tongues and the interpretation of tongues are special abilities imparted by God's Holy Spirit. They are not intended to gain personal attention and praise, but rather to help the recipient build up other Christians and strengthen their faith.
But getting back to the topic of Thin Places. The more I read the more I found myself nodding in agreement with what was appearing on my screen. And I began to think about the times in my life where I had this sense that there was more happening in that moment and that place, than just what I could see with my eyes. Times when I have touched a part of an old wall and been filled with a feeling of returning, of history or emotion that was out of proportion to the occurrences in that space and time.
There have been instances in my life where I would suddenly be gripped by feelings so strong they were almost tangible entities standing in front of me. Some of these experiences were frightening, some incredibly emotional and others sent strong tingles along my spine and fingertips. And contrary to what a lot of people might think, most of these “encounters” have not been in expected locations. Once or twice such a feeling has come to me at a ruined church or well known landmark. But most often it has been in more common moments. A front walkway, on a phone call, standing in a doorway, or a living room and once in a small woods.
In talking about Thin Places it can be helpful to make the distinction between such a place and a Thin Moment. I believe such moments are more common than places. Many of us have had an experience that we have felt at such a deeply personal and spiritual level that we cannot ignore the truth of the presence of God or the sense of Other. To date my most profound such experience was beside my grandfather’s bed as he was dying. But that is for another time.
So you may be asking – why would I be writing about this now? Mostly because of two specific instances that occurred in the last couple of months: Amy’s death and then a phone call from Hawk a few days later.
On Sunday, March 10th the girls and I had driven down to Amy’s in order to drop off a week’s worth of meals for her, something we had been doing since she was let out of the rehab facility. This visit however was different from the first moment.
The apartment was not different and nothing all that out of the usual occurred, there was just a sense of change in the air. I am not sure either of the girls were aware of it but I do believe Amy picked up on it as well. She had taken a nasty fall the day before and aside from our usual tasks for her we had supplied her with two ice bags for the bruising which was causing her so much discomfort. Except this was more like a massive hematoma rather than just a bruise, and I asked her if she did not think we should have a doctor take a look at the damage. That is when she gave me the first of two “looks”. Not a hostile or dismissive look but almost one of KNOWING.
As we were leaving that afternoon I had a deep sense that I was supposed to try and say one more thing – as I turned in the doorway to address her in the special chair she relied so much on – the words would not come. But I did have the strongest urge to take a clandestine photograph of her. And a sense that this would be the last time I would ever see her.
This unfortunately became truth when two days later I received a call telling me she had collapsed and died a few hours earlier. At a deep level I was neither surprised not shocked by this news – I knew it from the first ringing of the phone. She had made her good-byes in her own way and was ready to leave her earthly body for a better existence. My moments of awareness were an example of a Thin Moment. An awareness of the greater spiritual forces and schedules at work all around us. Even when a person doesn’t believe in them, like Amy.
The next evening I received one of my sporadic calls from Hawk. However for the first time there was something in his voice that really grabbed me – a sense of finality and fate. And a sense of what I could describe as dread come over me – I remember thinking “This is the last time I am going to talk to him”. A feeling not eased by his words.
These two encounters seem to have almost reawakened something inside me. A heightened sense of awareness perhaps that I have been able to identify such moments and places since I was very young.
